impulsereader (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
impulsereader) wrote2012-06-22 04:30 pm
impulsereader) wrote2012-06-22 04:30 pm
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Would someone please Britishize this for me? I don't think the imagery is right for John.
Simon was so angry that he very inadvisably dropped his (bloody gorgeous antique [the complete and utter tosser]) rifle in a fit of temper, then began to screech and hop around like a jackrabbit in heat. John didn’t even register the report of the gun going off until after he’d begun this bizarre and fascinating behaviour.
Simon was so angry that he very inadvisably dropped his (bloody gorgeous antique [the complete and utter tosser]) rifle in a fit of temper, then began to screech and hop around like a jackrabbit in heat. John didn’t even register the report of the gun going off until after he’d begun this bizarre and fascinating behaviour.
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However, to me, if someone is *that* angry, you'd probably use another word for "angry" - livid, furious, etc. Also "screech" sounds a bit wrong too. (At least to me.)
Hmm. Maybe "Simon was so livid that he very inadvisably dropped his ... rifle [would it be a rifle or a shotgun?] in a fit of temper, then began to yelp and hop about like he was on a pogostick." ???