My (your) favorite spy

[impulsereader]

Very happily, the Much Ado sequence is beginning to gel in my head. Apparently my brain has self-preservation protocols built in which held off on this until I was done and had safely posted the first bit (being TSP woo hoo!). I can now begin working on the important bit while I use the Baker Street Interludes as caramelly-centred snack breaks.

This year (the Much Ado year) we are all about spies. In fact, in late-breaking news from the invisible being whispering into my brain: John paused, shook his head slightly in disbelief. “Hang on,” he said, “are you saying there’s a spy convention going on down the village?” “Well, I don’t believe they name it as such,” Mycroft sniffed, “but essentially, yes.”

I have plenty of competent investigators on the ground (J&S, Lestrade & Martin [Competent!Martin, yes, really] Hannay & Arbuthnot, Claude & Grandmere [yup, French Resistance] and Not Anthea [to whom I may need to issue a name this time around]) each of whom I need to give a plot line. So what I really need are some spies. Please feel free to fill out some or all of the requested criteria. Partially-filled info will serve as super secret mystery spy inspiration, so don’t be afraid to just flail round a bit. As always, I’m also open to *cough* borrowing an entire character if you have a favourite to offer up rather than making up someone new. In fact, take any character you’d like to see, and give them some motivation to become a spy!

**Do please note all spies are likely to be baddies; you don’t have to specify evil motivations, but don’t be surprised when your spy is thwarted within the story.**

Please feel free to submit as many spies as you like. The more spies the better!

Name:
Alias:
Country of employ:
Country of actual employ if other than above:
Country of actual actual employ if different from either of above:
Gender:
Age:
Motivation (read as, why he/she became a spy - could be accidental):
Weapon of choice:
Gadget of choice:
Vehicle of choice (air, sea, land, etc.):
Opinion on 007 (please specify incarnation):
Reason for wanting to attend our convention (read as, travel to England):
Medical condition (if any):
General demeanour:
Ultimate goal: Professional:
Ultimate goal: Personal:
Plot line you would like to see if I can manage it:
Other notes/observations (go wild!):

Comments

[azriona.livejournal.com]

Bill loves spy movies, and has offered up the following existing characters:

Austin Powers (I personally think this would be hysterical, especially if he tried to hit on not!Athena)
the parents from the Spy Kids movies
Ethan Hunt (Mission Impossible)
Jason Bourne

It sounds as if you have a plan for James Bond already, but Bill also suggests Felix Leiter, who is his CIA counterpart. (The recent incarnation, played by Jeffrey Wright, is particularly awesome.)

(He's happy to come up with more spies later if you want, but he's kind of distracted at the moment.)

[impulsereader.livejournal.com]

Woo hoo! Spies!

I think 007 is going to be a running gag - oh, that guy, :eyeroll: he's so passe, we're real spies!

[f-m-r-l.livejournal.com]

Name: Lisa Davis
Alias: Jennifer Miller
Country of employ: United States
Country of actual employ if other than above: Canada
Country of actual actual employ if different from either of above: Coca-Cola
Gender: Female
Age: 42
Motivation (read as, why he/she became a spy - could be accidental): She was looking for something that would take her far, far away from her soon-to-be ex, something that might give her coping skills (read 'defenses') should they run into each other again.
Weapon of choice: Poison darts. Generally inconspicuous.
Gadget of choice: In love with her smartphone.
Vehicle of choice (air, sea, land, etc.): Her favorite vehicle is whatever will blend in the best, though she enjoys Jet Blue coach and really likes her silver Honda Accord.
Opinion on 007 (please specify incarnation): (print) His strong belief that lesbianism can be cured through the application of his penis makes her feel sympathy for those villains who want to kill him in horrible ways.
Reason for wanting to attend our convention (read as, travel to England): Thinks the English countryside is somehow more charming than the American countryside. Has never seen a hedgehog in its native environment.
Medical condition (if any): Heart goes "pitter pat" when she sees darling pictures of kitties, hedgehogs, etc., followed by distractibility and muscle weakness. She goes misty-eyed when exposed to exceptional cuteness, affecting her visual acuity.
General demeanour: Usually whatever will help her blend into the background. Not intrinsically an unkind person, keeps up with all the social conventions of niceness, but can be very...ahem...goal oriented.
Ultimate goal: Professional: To uncover the secret formula for Coca-Cola, at which point she would have the option of double-crossing her employer.
Ultimate goal: Personal: To accumulate a strong investment portfolio that will allow her to retire and operate a little gift shop full of adorable knickknacks, a cat, and the occasional company of someone nice.
Plot line you would like to see if I can manage it: She shouldn't fall for John or Sherlock. But if John triggers her "cute little creature" response, that might work.
Other notes/observations (go wild!): According to current reports, the job of spying for America tends to be mundane, paperwork-laden, and as unexciting as the people involved can manage. Because the goal is to be inconspicuous. So I thought someone really rather ordinary might be, I don't know, a challenge to include.

[impulsereader.livejournal.com]

She wouldn't be silly enough to fall for John or Sherlock; a possible match for Martin, though...

This is brilliant, she'll go well when put up against Lestrade.

[f-m-r-l.livejournal.com]

Name: Harold Parkington
Alias: Parks (most of his friends use it)
Country of employ: Works as night manager at a local gas station outside Des Moines.
Country of actual employ if other than above:
Country of actual actual employ if different from either of above:
Gender: Male
Age: Thirty-ish
Motivation (read as, why he/she became a spy - could be accidental): Parks has been mostly shut out of his twin brother's life. He figures that's because his brother is some kind of executive and Parks is a night manager at a gas station. But when his older (by minutes) brother vanishes, Parks feels he must look into it.
Weapon of choice: Has a baseball bat right next to the panic button behind the counter at work.
Gadget of choice: His swiss army knife has been useful in a hundred different ways, but he had to leave it behind to fly.
Vehicle of choice (air, sea, land, etc.): 1995 Saab 9000 Turbo. Not restored so much as repaired as often and as carefully as possible.
Opinion on 007 (please specify incarnation): All the movie versions of James Bond have really cool theme songs. He wants a really cool theme song.
Reason for wanting to attend our convention (read as, travel to England): His brother has disappeared mysteriously, but left behind a paid package booking for this excursion. Parks decided to take it in hopes that it will provide clues as to where his brother went.
Medical condition (if any): dandruff (hey, you never know what the presence of dandruff near an object can tell Sherlock)
General demeanour: Affable, puzzled, occasionally stoned. Right now he's really determined and paying as much attention as he knows how.
Ultimate goal: Professional: Find a job that doesn't involve being night manager at a gas station, maybe one where he could afford to marry his girlfriend.
Ultimate goal: Personal: Currently finding his brother. Long term marrying his girlfriend and being able to move into a half-decent place with her.
Plot line you would like to see if I can manage it: I know these people are to thwart, but it might be nice if he somehow ended up with something (money, job, inheritance, whatever) that allowed him to achieve his long term personal goal.
Other notes/observations (go wild!): Note that his twin brother is probably a spy.

[impulsereader.livejournal.com]

Yes, this guy is begging for a happy ending. I think I can manage it. He would of course be traveling under his brother's name...I do wonder what sort of trouble his brother has landed himself in...

[f-m-r-l.livejournal.com]

Name: Eleanor Willoughby
Alias: The Headmistress
Country of employ: Russia
Country of actual employ if other than above:
Country of actual actual employ if different from either of above:
Gender: Female
Age: She is timeless, and it would be presumptuous to say otherwise.
Motivation (read as, why he/she became a spy - could be accidental): She has a terrible fondness for nice things, beyond what her official income can support.
Weapon of choice: The right word in the right ear.
Gadget of choice: The Jura Impressa J9.3 One Touch TFT. No, it has nothing to do with spying, but a great deal to do with her motivation.
Vehicle of choice (air, sea, land, etc.): Black cab. Whatever other travel arrangements are made, chances are that the words "first class" will be somewhere in the description.
Opinion on 007 (please specify incarnation): All versions of James Bond are so horribly déclassé that she would never admit to any amount of familiarity.
Reason for wanting to attend our convention (read as, travel to England): She lives in London already. She would like to familiarize herself with the features of the latest bugs and wiretapping equipment. More importantly, she needs somewhere inconspicuous to get away from her relatives.
Medical condition (if any): Migraines at the slightest suggestion she should spend the holidays with her family.
General demeanour: Haughty.
Ultimate goal: Professional: To know where all the bodies are buried and obtain substantial remuneration for that information.
Ultimate goal: Personal: To outlive her parents and recover from their sincere pity. They express no pride in her career because they're too busy feeling sorry for her, poor thing, who had to have a career instead of a husband to take care of her.
Plot line you would like to see if I can manage it: One parent or set of parents follows her, wanting to privately make a case for the acceptance of their child into her school. Your call how they try to do this — money? power? chocolate? sex? And how does it throw off her timing, trying to accomplish her ends while still not making a bad impression on these people who might talk about her or even blackmail her?
Other notes/observations (go wild!): She runs a very prestigious school, one that makes parents very competitive when trying to get their child accepted. This gives her the chance to monitor a lot of gossip, know the comings and goings of various important parents, and from time to time pick up information from the unguarded speech of children. She has bugs, wire taps, and informants of her own. People assume that her desire to know what is happening with whom and when stems from a desire to maintain the prestige and image of the school.

[f-m-r-l.livejournal.com]

Oh, when I say "One parent or set of parents follows her", I mean the parents of the young contenders for a place at her school.

[impulsereader.livejournal.com]

I was confused for only a moment, then I picked up on that. I do like the idea of a spy being pursued by a rank amateur.

[f-m-r-l.livejournal.com]

An extremely motivated rank amateur. The right connections at the right schools are terribly important.

[pargoletta.livejournal.com]

This will be really tricky, considering that this spy has been dead for eight years, but there's just so much inherent humor here. I'd love to see what you could do with . . .

Name: Julia Child

Alias: The French Chef

Country of employ: United States

Country of actual employ if other than above: PBS

Country of actual actual employ if different from either of above: The hearts and stomachs of millions of formerly timid American chefs

Gender: Female

Age: Kind of the problem. She'd be 100 years old, except that she died in 2004.

Motivation (read as, why he/she became a spy - could be accidental): because (get this!) she was too tall to enlist in the women's branches of the military!

Weapon of choice: Chef knife and butter. Lots of butter.

Gadget of choice: Usually a wire whisk, but she's come around to accepting the stand mixer and the food processor

Vehicle of choice (air, sea, land, etc.): Delivery truck

Opinion on 007 (please specify incarnation): Whoever he is, he's an amateur

Reason for wanting to attend our convention (read as, travel to England): Because English cooking is even more in need of improvement than American cooking. Also, a lengthy coastline, so she can test out the shark repellant she helped develop

Medical condition (if any): None. The woman ate creamy French food and lived to be almost 92 years old. She has the constitution of a horse.

General demeanour: Insanely cheerful, shrieking about "absolutely lovely [insert weird food item here] in that characteristic high-pitched voice of hers, so what if you mess up in the kitchen, you can always rescue things, and none of your guests need ever know

Ultimate goal: Professional: Revolutionize the way people think about food

Ultimate goal: Personal: Lull everyone into a food coma so she can take over the world. Also, make a perfect Tarte Tatin.

Plot line you would like to see if I can manage it: The time she cooked up a batch of Primordial Soup. Seriously. There is video. I have a copy I can send you, or we can head down to the Museum of Science and Industry, which I think still plays it.

Other notes/observations (go wild!): Just . . . this.

[impulsereader.livejournal.com]

More later after I've followed your links, but...come on, spies are faking their own deaths all the time! Besides, I time traveled Claude Vernet. I'm less of a stickler than you. :-) But because it's you, and it's your request, I will do my utmost to make it as believable as I can. I'll consider it a challenge in becoming a better writer - try to be a little more disciplined about things actually making sense!